Amusing incidents.

[Katelb]

I have just put a post in the 'forum warming party' section and it reminded me of an amusing and true story.
One of my school friends lived in Lagos---this is more than 50 years ago--- and her father was in the management of BOAC as it existed then,in this capacity,he had to do a fair amount of entertainig.One such occassion involved the chairman of BOAC and sevral other guests and my friends' mother instructed the african serving boy in the correct way to serve Boars Head which apparantly was the main dish.She said 'you must put half an apple in the boars mouth,and a sprig of parsley behing each of its' ears and dress the serving dish with bits and pieces'. He said he understood what was required and when he came to serve it,he made a grand entrance holding the serving dish aloft and with half an apple stuck in his own mouth and a piece of parsley behind each of his ears.Needless to say his entrance brought the house down ! and he joined in the joke once he realised the misunderstanding!

[CountryLady]

Well! You couldn't make that one up could you!

[Crocus]

Well, nobody can say that he didn't do what he was told! Just wrong 'head'!

[Crocus]

Of course I'm now totaly a blank, but something I'll always remember is when we had a huge family gathering. It was during summer and everybody were outside on the patio, some in the pool, bro-in-law was busy at the bbq. The next moment we just heard a sound like something tearing, and a scream. Mom-in-law was sitting comfortably on her patio chair when next moment the canvas gave way and she went right through the canvas and frame! Bum on the floor, feet hanging over the frame, arms hanging over the frame!! She didn't get hurt or anything, and nobody could actually help her out of this chair because we laughed to much! Many tears rolled down many cheeks that day. We did get her out eventually! :D

[eleanor2]

you lot are a good laugh.love your stories.

[sheddie]

When I was young we lived in a house like Coronation Street and had a wash house over the yard(this was our kitchen)we had an old green cooker and we used to put 50ps in the meter for gas.My mum was cooking when the 50p ran out so instead of turning the cooker off then relighting she went and put her 50p in and lit the oven with air in the pipes. The flames went Wooosh! and caught her hair on fire, it took all the front of her hair off and her eyebrows. She was just smoking when she came into the house and i went hysterical, my Dad could have killed me, so I ran up the yard into our privy to laugh, I always used to go there if I got the giggles.I stayed there for what seemed hours and thought of serious things to get my face straight, then ventured back indoors and burst out laughing. i never lived it down and my Mums hair always had a little tuft at the front that never grew back!

[sunflower]

Years ago, when I was training to be a nursery nurse, I worked in a children's convalscent home for children who had been ill or were unable to go on holiday. Some of these children were from the old Bethnal Green and had never seen the seaside. Their favourite trick was to single out a person on the beach asleep in a deckchair. Kneeling behind the deckchair, they would quietly and quickly dig, dig, dig, until......all of a sudden the deckchair would collapse into the hole! It's what one would call a rude awakening! I never had the heart to tell them off, it was so funny!

[Oola]

My (older) sister was potty training and learning about the letters in her name at the same time. She did a big poo and then went round showing everyone that it was indeed in the shape of 'C' for Claire.

She also went and told the window cleaner that her mum had "big boobies" for no reason....apparently he almost fell of his ladder!

When my Dad was younger he was a bit of a tearaway and used to have an ongoing warfare with the other boys down his street. So he and one of his brothers decided to make a big cannon out of the vacuum cleaner. It would shoot out putty, except it didn't quite work one time... so my dad looked down the big funnel into the vacuum and *BOOM* it went off - leaving my dad with no eyebrows or eyelashes.

[SummerSkye]

Sheddie I can relate to your story of your poor Mum; we grew up in similar circumstances. I always get the giggles at inappropriate times too and face it most comedians get their biggest laughs from sketches with "accidents".

[Katelb]

Oola ,that story about your older sister reminds of another similar one.Once again it involves friends of ours whose daughter was presumably constipated because she waited until everyone was seated at the table and had just started eating,and she emerged in her nightie and carrying her potty which she set down with great precision close to her mother's seat and climbed on to it saying'Now I'm going to have a big big try' Well she succeeded and was whisked away from the dining room leaving the guests in fits of laughter.Quite the exhibitionist!!

[Redstart]

The funniest thing we saw was a our young daughter's ballet class, It was an exhibition for parents and was fine until the pirhouette- our daughter hadn't listend when told to stop and just kept on going until she fell over. The trouble was, her dad and I just burst out laughing, as she did, but everyone else was po-faced - which made the three of us worse. I think they will have breathed a sigh of relief when we moved away. And our daughter did not become dancer.

[sheddie]

I only remember getting one prize at school - a history book and when it was presented at our local college, I came on from the side and slipped across the stage on my bum and sat at the feet of the presenter.I have never forgotten!

[dinger]

When my children were younger my son was going to karati lessons ,he was showing off what he had learnt when the youngest daughter tried to copy the high kick, .As she kicked her leg up it took both her feet off the floor she was wearing her nightie .It was so funny she looked like she was in flight .Luckily she did'nt hurt herself although she cried with embarassment.

[jazzactivist]

I couldn't remember any funny incidents to add to this thread, but today I have one. This morning my neighbour and I were standing outside our houses chatting and shivvering in the wind, when the oldest resident rode towards us on her bike. She wears voluminous skirts and as she came near to us the wind caught her skirt and blew it right up over her face, revealing to us not the expected pink or white combinations or big pants, but a pair of black silky shorts with pink lace! She yanked her skirt down and peddled on by, and we were speechless and then had to lean against the house for laughing. That will teach us to stereotype a single woman who has just entered her 90s!

[Crocus]

Black silky shorts with pink lace! Rose of "Keeping up Appearances" comes to mind here..........! :rolleyes:

[sheddie]

How lovely, bless her, if you've got it flawnt it I say! perhaps I should get a bike!!

[eleanor2]

i wasn't thinking of getting on a bike but i was thinking of getting the black and pinks.

[dinger]

i wasn't thinking of getting on a bike but i was thinking of getting the black and pinks.

OOh la la Eleanor will they be french

[Crocus]

What's "the other women" s name in Last of the summer Wine (the blond on the bike?) :rolleyes:

[franbee]

Marina

[Crocus]

Ahhh, thanks Franbee.

[Crocus]

May sound silly and of no meaning, but to me......... I went to get out my sewing machine (to sew a new peg bag as mine decided it's had enough of this world) and when I took it from the shelve where I store it, I felt something brushing my hand :eek:........... something like a spider's web, or a spider, or something. I already had the sewing machine in my hands and nearly dropped it on the floor because of this rather strange, soft eerie feeling on my hand. :eek:

I refrained from screaming like there's no tomorrow as some of the boys' friends were here (they might've thought I'm just a stupid woman)!!.:o So I just very quickly put the sewing machine back on the shelve, and started to wipe, clap, anything you can think of with my hand to get rid of this ... well spider or web. .................................................. .............................
just to notice it's the cotton which went a bit limp (was still on the machine) and actually just brushed over my hand!!!!! Oh goodness me, how stupid CAN one be eh????:o

[Katelb]

Crocus,not stupid at all it could quite easily have been a cobweb (not suggesting you have not cleared them away!!!) or a spider or worse,I think I would have reacted in exactly the same way.
I can't imagine your sons or their friends might thinking of you as a stupid woman....scream or no scream....it might have brought out the protective instinct in them!! you never know. Glad you found out what gave you the fright though,there's nothing worse than mysteries.xx

[Crocus]

I think the possibility of a cobweb was very real as now, during November, a lot of things happen here - suddenly the flies woke up, daddy longlegs are starting to appear, now matter how many times you dust and try to get rid of them, the very next morning there's a new daddy longlegs sitting in the corner with a huge smile on it's face, but I smile back and dust it away! :eek: xxx

[souter girl]

Laughed out loud!
This I heard from a charming lady in her sixties who had been a stewardess with BOAC in the "old days". Very English and with lovely manners she was taken aback when an American passenger on a transatlantic flight asked for the "restroom".Not knowing what he meant, perhaps assuming he was tired, she replied that she didn't think they had one, but he could borrow a pillow if he liked!!!

[Crocus]

Oh my goodness SG, imagine ........ LOL! xx

[Crocus]

You won't ever believe this! This afternoon I took some potatoes out of the bag, and the same thing happened, only this time it was a spiders web!! Strange thing is, I used potatoes on Saturday as well and there was no web in the bag. Shows you the daddy longlegs only need a day to "catch you if they can" and they did! Goodness, twice on one day, and it being Monday and all! What's waiting for the rest of the week I ask myself, I perhaps I should rather not ask ............ xx